Yankee Pankee

While Alex Rodriguez weighs whether or not to opt out of his record-setting contract with the New York Yankees, his wife Cynthia (photo) has decided to stay.

Even though her handsome hubby made headlines off the field on the evening of May 29, 2007-- ironically, the very night that his team began their comeback from a nadir of 21-29 to make the playoffs for the 13th straight year! The next morning, the New York Post played off his nickname (photo) in showing a cell-phone photo of A-Rod and "a mystery blonde" entering a strip club in Toronto after the Yankees lost to the Blue Jays: "The pair left the strip club alone and were last seen boarding the elevator together at the Four Seasons Hotel"--where 'Stray-Rod' was staying.

Naturally, yours truly immediately "sleuthed out" the iden•titty of the buxom blonde: she is Joslyn Noel Morse, a 30-year-old exotic dancer in Las Vegas. Described as "a corn-fed Catholic girl from Iowa who quickly took up the stripping trade after high school," Joslyn looks like she could give the soon-to-be "30 Million Dollar Man" a run for his money (honey, photo). Naturally, the daily tabloid couldn't run the entire photo of A-Rod's "date"...but that shouldn't stop us! (photo).

Those "silly•cones" were a-pair-ently what caught the third-baseman's attention (photo) when the duo met at Scores nightclub in Vegas several weeks before (the first time they "ate" together, photo). "A-Rod is known as the king of the strip clubs," a source told the Daily News. "He gives the girls his number to meet somewhere else later on" (and Joslyn got back to him, photo). Whether or not they ended up in the sack (photo) is anyone's guess...but forgiving wife Cynthia had "intercourse" with the persistent press in a shirt that fit her attitude toward them to a "T" (photo) at Yankee Stadium. Fans at Fenway, however, were less forgiving than Wifey when the Bronx Bombers played the Red Sox just days later--donning "blonde bimbo" masks whenever Rodriguez came to the plate (photo). But, as befitting the best player in baseball, A-Rod had the last laugh: hitting a game-winning homer off Boston's closer to win the "rubber" {let's hope so!} game of the series, quiet the heckling crowd, and turn the season around for his ball•club (photo). Good hitters always adjust...